the mousey girl screams "violence, violence!"

Adolescent behaviour in a grown man does seem wrong but fuck it I'm being indulgent.

A few weeks back (the night HP7 came out) I went to Boogloo to see The Fay Wrays, Mat Saunders and Lisa Moorish who was doing Pussyole acapella which was quite funny . Any way I got there at 8ish ordered a drink and sat under the clock, I put my trilby on the stiool next to me and surveyed the pub from my vantage point, it was empty bar two fellas sitting at the corner of the bar in front of me. I felt really comfortable there, in the pub I mean, it felt special thinking of all the people who have drank and played here in the past and the fact it just looked like an ordinary boozer. Half of the Fay Wrays came in with Keara which brought me out of my reverie, hugs and handshakes later I was told they mentioned me in an interview and I was gobsmacked, my heart rose and I was really happy. We talked about their gig at Hackney Empire and it turned out there was a cock up with the guestlists and even they couldn't get in to their own gig and they were really disappointed that I didn't get in but I wasn't too fussed and it was nice to be thought of. We sat outside so the smokers could smoke and a young lady called Fizz came along who is a photographer and she shoots bands, I'd seen her at gigs before and was always intimidated by her,don't know why but it turns out she is very nice and easy to talk to.

All the bands were awesome and the DJ afterwards was great, I went to the bar once more and noticed that one of the fellas from earlier was actually Shane MacGowan and he was drinking triple gin and tonics of which I bought him one.

It was time to go, I wanted to pick up HP7 and read it before work the next day. I left with Lucie, Cammy, Keara, Fizz and Nip who got in a cab and I said I'd walk down to Archway to get a better chance of a bus...........I didn't make it. ..............There was someone on a pushbike........................ I said No you ain't and laughed. .....................So it's about 5:30 in the morning and someone is asking me if I'm ok I said yeah I just need to get back to central London, the woman pointed me in the direction of the bus back, it turns out i was in Crouch End which is about a mile and a half from the pub I was in. My hands were drenched in blood and everything was blurry It wasn't until later I figured out it was because my glasses were gone. Later I noticed I made 2 phone calls I don't remember making and my hat was gone. When I looked in the mirror my face was cut and bruised and my nose was bloody. I went to bed.

I went to hospital on Sunday where they said I had concussion and amnesia as a result of being hit about the head, I had a CT scan which was ok and they sent me home but I still had a raging headache that was to last 2 weeks.

This is the 1st time I've recounted the night in writing, but too many times orally.

 
I didn't go out after dark again for 2 weeks when I attended an of Montreal gig at the Scala my headache subsided and I was excited and apprehensive. The gig was sensational it was one of the best I've ever been, to anyone near the front got covered in red glitter and fake blood. When it was time to go I started to panic and my heart was racing but not like it was during the gig, I was scared and as soon as I left the club I jumped in the nearest taxi and it took the journey home to calm down and my headache flared up again.

Ever since I've been having really violent dreams but I think that's just my sub-concious trying to figure out what happened because I can't when awake. I've also been very run down and my immune system is really weak and I keep getting sick easily. I'm sure it will pass but for now I just feel fucked.

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I did have a funny dream the other night though, I was at The Old Blue Last it was during the day and there was a battle going on with loads of indie bands fighting an unseen enemy "2 tribes" was the soundtrack. I had a guitar with a TV screen (???) and a large bottle of lager with a sports cap (???). There were also french groupies outside an Irish pub which isn't really there (???). I think I need help

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What is wrong with the NME I mean the Shane/Peter compare in the Babyshambles interview was annoying and lazy and why do they keep slating the park. I might stop buying it.